Watch Mike Pomeroy...before your morning dump.

There was a minute or two in my life that I was determined to work in television. My grandparents live in Bristol, Connecticut - the headquarters of ESPN. For years, I would be driven past (then, drive by) the world wide leader in sports and imagine myself working inside. I chose my college sight unseen, just for its proximity to ESPN. But after a few TV production classes with some extremely horrible professors, I decided this shit ain't for me.

What also wasn't for me is the 2010 comedy Morning Glory. Now, I shit you not, I'll watch anything, but this one was a peace offering for the wife. You know, the ol' you've watched 17 guy flicks, how about we watch something for you, dear type situations. Married guys, you know what I'm saying (and single guys, why don't you get off the internet and go do whatever the f--k you want). Anyway, we fired this one up close to two weeks ago and decided to finally finish it last night. And while we might have been politely smiling during the initial watch, by the end we were both rolling our eyes and praying for credits.

The um, story, is pretty simple. the ever-perky Becky (McAdams) is hired to be the producer for a failing morning show titled Daybreak. Though her dream is The Today Show, Becky takes the job despite everyone thinking she'll never make it. Well, spoiler alert, everything turns out fantastically. I know, I was floored, too.

Douchery aside, the predictability wasn't the main problem here, it was the unbelievable absence of any real conflict. Any slight issues that come up are whisked away with either a stern look plus a hand on a hip, a musical montage, an all-too cutesy symbolic gesture or some combination of the three. I wasn't looking for Good Night, and Good Luck by any means, but outside of a stubborn old prick, it's all puppy dogs and rainbows.

I'll try to make this quick. Here is the morning edition of the Yays and Boos, does-Harrison-Ford-even-like-making-movies? style

I was hoping for a hunting accident.

Yaaaaaay!

• Give it up for hard work. Becky seriously busts her ass and has earned everything.
• The scene where everyone throws shit at her, and she nails it was typical, but well done.
• Though not explored too much, I do like the idea that in the battle of news vs. entertainment, it was a f--king beatdown.
• Nite Owl. So dreamy.
• I liked the cameo by all the old news guys (Chris Matthews, Morley Safer & my main man Bob Schieffer). Good stuff.
• And one of the ultimate That Guys, John Pankow in yet another solid, yet thankless role.

My wife and I sat the same way during this one.

 Booooooo!

• Let's just get right to it: Harrison Ford. Have you ever seen him interviewed? He always seems to be quietly furious that he even has to be there. Extend that version of Han Solo for an entire feature and you've got yourself crotchety bastard Mike Pomeroy.
• Who literally growls every word he says.
• Oh, and as hard working and girl power as Becky is, she's still a carpenter's dream.
• You know when people in movies say why am I telling you this? I know this one! It's because the script is terrible.
• Pomeroy's big story is absurdly presented and executed. I'd have preferred the promised sauerkraut festival to this underwhelming major turning point.
• There is so much fluffy pop music played throughout this, your mom could probably work out to it.
• How about those scenes in movies where the main character must run (usually in slo-motion) to where they belong? We've got a ridiculous one here, let me tell you. I mean, she runs through pigeons. I'm not sure if her heels were in her hand, though. Then it would be super-cliche.
• And I guess it's fitting, but I almost cried when they walked off into the sunset. Tears of rage.

Bottom Line: If you watch a lot of The Today Show, you'll probably really like this movie. But you're probably an older woman - so there's no way in Hell you're actually reading this. For the rest of you, who are we kidding? You'll never watch that. Or this.