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Friday, April 3, 2015

Blogathon: A Fistful of Moments (p. II)

I just saw the preview for the new Paul Blart movie and thought to myself, It's bad enough they made a first one, but now they're making another one? What the f--k? Who asked for more of this nonsense?


Anyway, for Fisti's A Fistful of Moments blogathon, here is the promised second batch of my favorite cinematic moments. My first post [here], nine of my twenty-one favorite scenes, featured rectangular squares, death becoming him and lots and lots of daffodils. But the one that seemed to resonate the most? 

The one with the transvestite. 
Eating dog shit.

Let's just move on, shall we?


Group #5: The Person Next to Me...

Nightmare on Elm Street (1986) - ...should have been arrested. I was so terrified when Freddy stretched his arms out [and dragged his knives along the wall?], it haunted me for years. Like, until I turned 9.

The Green Mile (1999) - ...sobbed so hard, begging me to hold them (unbeknownst to me, I was on a date). John Coffey's execution scene completely wrecked me. To this day, I can barely muster the strength to watch it. But...I kinda love it, anyway.

Aliens (1986) - ...also couldn't believe it. Me and my brother stared at each-other wide-eyed. Why can't we see them? The dots say they're in the room! As a kid, this scene was the pinnacle of suspense.

Copland (1997) - ...held their breath, too. When Freddy (Stallone) stumbles up the road to end things, we were absolutely riveted. I love how slowly it all plays out, not to mention the fact that the audio is just about entirely absent. 

Blade II (2002) - ...may have given me a high-five. The first five minutes of the Blade sequel are the right kind of ridiculous. Blade not only shoots multiple vampires in the head, but he also chokes the head off of a guy riding a motorcycle. Oh, and he blows a kiss...to his car.

       Group #6 (Final Group): If I ever need cheering up...


Undercover Brother (2002) - I actually love this entire movie, but the first five minutes? Priceless. It doesn't get any better than seeing Eddie Griffin singing We Want the Funk and not spilling his Big Gulp.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986) - I don't really believe in magic, but when Rooney's secretary takes the phone and makes those awful uhhhhhhh ohhhhh noises, I'm convinced anything's possible. Her loyalty kills me every time.

The Breakfast Club (1985) - Pretty much every minute with John Bender is the best minute ever, but when ol' John falls through the ceiling, I laugh like a lunatic. If I had a nickel for every time I said Could you describe the ruckus, sir? I'd have a shitload of nickels.

The Jim Carey Trifecta: All make the cut because of the number of times in my life I have referenced them.
  • The Cable Guy (1996) - The basketball scene is easily my favorite. Carey's awesome, but Jack Black brings it, too. No way....I'm on Steven's team.
  • Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) - Ace returns Boob Lady's dog, and things get a little out of control. The fact that she offers to take his pants off was funny enough, but the next twenty seconds are etched into my brain forever. We're real friendly around here! 
  • Dumb & Dumber (1994) - Of all the parts of this one I cherish, I think Lloyd's fantasy is my favorite. 
And finally, my favorite funny scene of all-time? The painting scene in Goodfellas. Tommy's analysis of his mother's painting is something dreams are made of. Everyone delivers here (love Liotta so much), but holy shit Pesci was on fire. I like this one. One dog goes one way, the other dog goes the other way. Brilliant.

Thanks for reading this ridiculousness, and thanks to Fisti for hosting. Oh, and thanks to anyone who was sitting next to me while these scenes played out. Spending that time with you? 

That's a great moment, too.

14 comments:

  1. The whole 'person sitting next to me' segment had me in stitches! This was incredible! LOL, The Cable Guy...I just saw that for the first time about a month ago and...LOL, that basketball scene was hilarious. BAH, Goodfellas! Thanks for making Part II just as awesome as Part I!

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    1. Thanks, man. It was a lot of fun, even if three-quarters of my picks are ridiculous.

      Dude, that scene in Goodfellas is the best. I almost can't handle how funny Pesci is there.

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  2. I really love how you split these up. I'm getting a lump in my throat just thinking about The Green Mile. That movie is so painful!

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    1. Thanks! I'm stoked to see that someone else appreciates the misery (and joy) of The Green Mile. I hardly ever revisit it, but if I do, it will undoubtedly destroy me.

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  3. I'm not sure which was a bigger tear-fest, the scene in Forrest Gump where he's talking to Jenny's grave or the vision shared by John Coffey in The Green Mile. Luckily I saw both of those solo many years after the debuts. Excellent posts!

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    1. Mike, I was left in shambles after both of them, but being that I was in the theater with another person, I remember doing my best to keep it together. I still cry when I see them now, but that initial viewing? Had I been alone?

      Yikes.

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  4. "Could you describe the ruckus, Sir?" I love it!!

    One of my students swears that Dumb & Dumber is the funniest comedy of all time.

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    1. I have probably said that line a thousand times. There's a good chance I'll just say it at random, but if someone happens to say the word 'ruckus' the only thing in doubt is who's going to say it first.

      Dumb & Dumber just might be. It might not be my number one, but that scene is waaaay up there.

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  5. Awesome choices! For me one of Jim Carrey moments that never fail to make me laugh? "The pen is blue! THE GODDAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!"

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    1. I always forget about Liar Liar, but that scene is hysterical, too. I was always partial to the bit in the elevator, too.

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  6. Perfect follow-up to part I. Love the Jim Carrey section. My fave moment from him the Ace Ventura movies is actually from the underrated 2nd flick when he climbs out of the fake Rhino. Even that's 2nd to the "big" reveal in the original, though.

    Everything Pesci does in Goodfellas is great. Used the "funny how" scene on my list. The painting is great, too. Gotta say it right, though - "One dog goes one way, dee udda dog goes dee udda way."

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    1. Thanks, Dell. Ah, Ace. I've actually only seen the second one once, and that was theatrically. I've somehow avoided it since. I know, I know. Pretty impressive. Anyway...I love just about every minute of the first one, but even as a young man, it seems the pervy stuff always resonated the most.

      "Funny how" is probably the most intense moment of the film, but it almost scares me too much. I was going to opt for when Spider tells Tommy to go f--k himself, but that scene breaks my heart. the painting, though? Cracks me up every time. Especially the way you typed it.

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  7. Love that Goodfellas painting. Liotta's face is priceless after De Niro says, "Looks like somebody we know... hahahhahahha!"

    And that scene from Copland is one of my favorite scenes ever. "I can't hear you, Ray."

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    1. Everybody in that Goodfellas scene is so hilarious, I don't even know how they could keep it together. Though to be honest, they kind of don't. Another reason why I love it so damn much.

      YES! Copland is such a good time, I can barely handle it. What a friggin' cast, you know? But, that scene? It's absolutely perfect.

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