This one shows spirit.

I'm sure you've heard what they've been saying now that it's over: it was a huge gamble! It shouldn't have worked out as well as it did. And while they were talking about the movie we saw, in fact, they might as well have been talking about my wife and I seeing it. Together. Because, let me tell you, for the first fifteen minutes? I thought I made a terrible, terrible decision.

My wife loathes sci-fi, and isn't even borderline interested in the Marvel Universe, but she loved Guardians of the Galaxy. And even though I'm three weeks out from having seen it (new job = imminent death of Two Dollar Cinema), I still consider it one of the most entertaining movies of 2014, and (tiny, adorable raccoon) hands down the best movie of the summer. There isn't a doubt in my mind.

Back in the begnining of August, I thought the early word/fanboy boners would steer me wrong, or at least make it impossible for Marvel's latest to live up to the hype, but that word (and those um, boners) was/were spot on. While the easy answer to Guardians success is to say that everything just works, I think what I loved most about it was the fact that it didn't take itself too seriously. And by that I mean that it's f--king hysterical. 

Most of the laughs come from the brilliantly-cast Chris Pratt as Starlord/Peter, but Riley Cooper's work as Rocket Raccoon consistently killed me. Rocket is such a dick in the best possible way that it still makes me smile. His insistence on various body parts being essential to the plan still cracks me up. I need his prosthetic leg.

Clearly, I'm avoiding much of the plot as it's been so long since I've seen the film (not to mention being deeply mired in my own personal Hell) that I really don't remember the specifics. As I recall, Peter/Starlord finds a mysterious orb and inadvertently becomes the target of a massive manhunt . Everybody wants the orb for world domination-type reasons, and Peter ends up forming a ragtag-team of intergalactic a-holes to (almost reluctantly, it seems) protect the universe. While each member of the crew (minus Groot, I suppose) is working for purely selfish reasons, Peter eventually shows them that the mission is bigger than all of them. Even though it's all pretty standard stuff, I'm not really doing any of it justice. I know. Shocking, right? 

Also not shocking, are the Yays and Boos. As we haven't seen a movie in almost a month (totally flaked on the #84athon which is a major bummer), they've been relegated to cheering and jeering the occasional episode of _________  (any title will do, promise) on Sprout. Nina from The Goodnight Show? Oh, her little pajama ensemble? That's a Yay. But Star? Huge Boo.

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

• The title sequence was frickin' great.
• Early on, there was some rat-kicking greatness. Really set the tone.
• Even though I liked the eventually nixed Stan Lee cameo idea better, what we did get was pretty sweet.
• Okay, I've already gone too far without mentioning the soundtrack. In a word, it f--king rules. Whatever, say it quickly.
• The prison escape, pictured to the left, was one of the best scenes in the movie. What Groot lacks in subtlety, he certainly makes up for in effectiveness.
• I thought Drax was going to be the weak link, but his ability to only accept things in the most literal fashion routinely killed me. 
• Which reminds me, the throat-slitting gesture? Perfect.
• Some of Peter's lines had to be improved by Pratt, right? My votes are the Jackson Pollack painting one, at least, not to mention the whole legend of Footloose.
• Man, We are Groot killed me. What the Hell is wrong with me?
• There is nothing better than a dance-off. Well, not in a PG-13 movie, anyway.
• Even though it was actually a tender moment, I couldn't help but laugh when Peter (I think), pets Rocket for a second.
• Michael Rooker! Sure, I can't help but look at this guy and think of stink-palming him with some chocolate-covered pretzels, but I loved him here. That weapon of his was so badass!
• Some of the violence, despite being cartoon-ish, was still really impressive. Rocket is responsible for most of it, though Drax blasting Nebula was pretty sweet, too.
• That final battle scene above the city was very cool.
• As was my main man, Wreck-It-Ralph.
• And finally, I just want to say that this movie was exactly what I wanted it to be. It's about as playful an action movie as I've ever seen. Maybe it won't hold up the next time I watch it, but that day, in that theater, it was just about perfect.

Boooo!

• Okay, what the f--k was that beginning? I mean, I get it, but my wife turned to me horrified. I didn't know that's how this would open, you know? You were going to take Matty to see this!!? Yeesh.
• Drax calling up Ronan was quite the dick move, no?
• And speaking of Ronan, did anyone really give a shit about this guy? Yeah, he looks (and sounds) pretty badass, but Loki, he ain't.
• And finally, not that this has anything to do with the movie itself, but I can't believe this is the last movie I've seen, theatrically or otherwise. This almost month-long stretch could be my longest ever. I guess this Boo is for adulthood.

Well, speaking of being grown up, I gotta go to bed like, twenty minutes ago. No more late night posts for me. I actually have parents coming to school tomorrow to talk to, you know, get to know their child's teacher! And while I'm likely to be extra exhausted by that time, I still don't really know what I'm going to say. Maybe I'll just repeat the same three words over and over.

It worked for Vin Diesel.