Sunday, April 1, 2012

I wasn't there, even when I was.

That's more like it! After suffering through the glittery boas of the glam rock era, it turns out that greatness in the music-film genre was just a country song away. Crazy Heart, a 2009  film, is another notch in the belt for the incredibly talented Jeff Bridges. Though, for me, The Dude is his ultimate character (maybe even the ultimate), Bridges' Bad Blake is a close second. He may not the Dude, but he is the man.

Wow. You're still here. Yeah that last line was incredibly lame, but nothing in this movie is. The performances are all top-notch, the music is excellent and the story's quite touching. And the ending? Phew. I actually got a bit choked up at the end (I'm a huge bitch, I know). Unless you hate genuine human drama, you will like this movie. If you don't enjoy it, I want to know from you exactly what it's like to be a heartless, bitter a-hole who hates life. Do tell.

Long ago, a friend of mine - let's call him Haspe, would go on and on about the wonders of Mr. Robert Duvall. I never hated Duvall or anything, but always found it curious that my friend would pledge allegiance to him. As I've grown up, it's altogether shocking that people don't worship the ground he walks on (I'm talking Duvall, here). I frickin' love this guy. If I met him and he wasn't anything short of the best person on the planet I would hope to die immediately. Now, that might be overselling it a bit, but I really do think he's awesome. And his character in this one, Wayne? I dare you to find a nicer person on film. Unless of course, maybe some implied racism (or direct senility) bothers you. Otherwise, he rules. Frickin' Haspe. First he calls Nowitzki, and now this.

If Bridges is wearing that shirt, my dad is currently shirtless.
While I'm dredging up the past, let me say that my other good high school friend (and budding filmmaker) Justin, used to swear by Maggie Gyllenhaal. I'm pretty sure he was enamored with how beautiful she was. I think she's okay, but I think he confused beauty with willingness to get naked on camera. She doesn't here, but it's cool. Honestly, I think Gyllenhaal is another victim of the DushFactor. Search is your friend.

Well, let's write a heartbreaking song about the Yays and Boos, shall we? Hopefully Tommy Sweet'll like it.
With all respect to The Smoking Pen, these two are BAMFs.
  • Of all the hobbies that Bad Blake had, I think watching Spanish Female Prison Movies was my favorite. That or making biscuits.
  • How he ended every call with his agent. Awesome.
  • Colin Farrell. I was shocked by his character. and his performance. Both very solid.
  • I've got this whole driving thing all wrong. I always have my pants closed and my belt on. Thanks for showing me the way, Bad. Means a lot.
  • And in all serious, Jeff Bridges. Just awesome.

  • Oooh. Late 50's groupies. Not cool, Bad. Not cool.
  • Not only does he dress like my dad, he drives like him, too. My dad once told me he slept for an entire 40 mile drive. He woke up in the other lane after a guy had been honking at him for minutes.
  • Turns out bringing a four year-old to a bar is a bad idea. Who knew?
  • The end. Damn.
So, I guess I liked this one a lot. Maybe it's not as good as I think it is, but remember, I watched this around a showing of Velvet Goldmine. That movie makes everything else look much, much better.


  1. "If you don't enjoy it, I want to know from you exactly what it's like to be a heartless, bitter a-hole who hates life. Do tell."

    AHAHA! Brilliance, my friend. Brilliance. I still have to see this one. I'll get on of these days. I definitely have to be "in the right mood" to enjoy a serious human drama story. But...Jeff Bridges. Is the man. And now I have to see it, now that I know there are BAMFs abound. Randomly, I had no idea Colin Farrell was in it! That guy always surprises me. He clearly has a shit ton of potential as there are plenty of movies he's really fucking good in. But for every movie he's epic in, he's made 5 others that suck. I'm pretty sure he's just a lazy motherfucker who rolls with the paychecks. Not that I can blame him, but...when he brings it, he brings it. In Bruges, anyone?

    In short. This. I have to see. Great review!

    1. Your point about Farrell is spot on. To be fair, I think he's lowering the ratio lately, maybe 3 shit for every example of awesomeness. Early on, he was probably 10 to 1.

      As for In Bruges, that mofo is sitting in my collection still sealed. Ridiculous. All the shit I watch and I haven't even cracked that one? Shame!

      When you do catch Crazy Heart, let me know. I think I'm overselling it's greatness. I tend to confuse 'good' with 'unbelievably f--king great'. I also sometimes invert 'okay' with 'horrid pile of dogshit'.

  2. Nice review! I agree about Farrell, he was really good here. I did not like the movie that much, but the acting was very good.