I guess they're headaches. At least I hope they are. (I honestly feel as if headache is the most arbitrary term)
Sometimes, I'll go to put my deodorant on...and I've already done it.
And when I give directions? I'll use the word thing more often than not. Grab the thing, turn left at the thing. Oh, and don't even ask about receiving directions. I think my face contorts to something like Sloth from The Goonies if there's more than one step.
But what really scares the shit out of me? It's this alleged tender moment I'll often share with my dog, Dodger. No, not that kind of tender moment, you f--king sicko. No, it's this moment where his whole world stops. And he'll kind of glide over to me, staring me straight in the eyes, and get his face so close to mine. I pet him, smile like this is beautiful, but really I'm thinking: he smells my brain about to explode.
Don't think I'm making light of any hint or form of neurological disorder, believe me, I'm not. But after sweating all the way through the captivating Still Alice (or as I call it, F--k That: The Movie), I've started second-guessing just about everything in my life. Sure, slasher films and torture porn can make you jump, but early-onset Alzheimer's? That's where the big scares are.
Julianne Moore plays Alice, a fifty year-old linguistics professor who is absolutely blindsided by the progressive disease. Initially, it's all Sorry, I'm drawing a blank and Your name again?, but it quickly deteriorates into something much worse. Soon, Alice doesn't remember where she is, or how she could possibly know that nice actress from the play. I don't have any real firsthand experience with the disease, but here it's portrayed in what feels like a very honest and very sincere fashion.
And it's horrific. I'm sorry, did I already mention that?
Anyway, while I assumed this movie was going to be a grind (I'm not the biggest fan of Moore, truth be told), it was anything but. Honestly, my wife and were riveted the entire time. Yes, the performances are great, and the story compelling, but that I expected. But what blew me away? The pace. Still Alice is f--king breakneck.
