What happens if I say no?

Do you think his shower is golden, too?

When I was six or seven years old I played on a soccer team. We were the Pirates. We had orange and black uniforms and I wore number 9. Awesome, right? Well, not quite. I have little to no memory of any game action, but I do remember this one incident. We were getting a drink at the water fountain after practice when this weird kid on my team (he "spoke" in odd grunts and mumbles) grabbed my hand and placed it under the panel on the front of the water fountain. I remember being really surprised this kid was touching me and then being horrified when my finger was sliced open on this jagged shard of metal somewhere in the inner workings of the fountain. The kid mumbled some sort of satisfaction and I just quietly freaked out as the blood spewed from my finger.

Great story a-hole, but what does this have to do with tonight's flick, The Devil's Double? Well, that sadistic bastard was my coach's son. Even at a young age, I felt at the mercy of that relationship. How I could tell the dad that his son was a psycho? Surprise! I couldn't.

So, take that story and multiply it by a billion, make it actually relevant to more than one person on the entire planet, and you have something resembling the plot of The Devil's Double. Well, not at all, actually. But still.

If you're still with me, the plot concerns itself with the true story of Latif Yahia. Latif was a loyal Iraqi who was hand selected to be the body double of Saddam's son, Uday. If that doesn't sound frightening enough, turns out Uday is a complete trainwreck/nightmare of a person. I know, I thought he'd be a stand up guy, too - but, gasp! - he's a real douche. Coke-fueled and intermittently cocksure, Uday routinely picks up his ladies at local high schools or weddings. Their weddings. This is a person you simply must oblige. No matter how horrible the request is. For example, at his birthday, Uday wants everyone to get naked. Everyone. Not cool, man. Not cool at all.

When Uday snaps, it can get crazy. Like, slicing Achilles crazy.

I've gone on way too long to not mention Dominic Cooper. His performances as Uday and Latif are remarkable. They are two very distinct personalities and Cooper plays off himself effortlessly. Seeing one become the other is intriguing and undoubtedly worth the price of admission.

Before I go, I want to mention the patriarchs in this one. Obviously, Saddam is a bad customer whom you simply don't want to piss off. Oh, he might be having a blast playing tennis with his double. But embarrass the family and he's liable to cut your di*k off. And while I thought Latif was a badass, it turns out that the apple didn't fall far from the tree. Check out the cajones that his Pops shows at the end. Frickin' awesome.